Hot Coffee

“Need a pick me up?”


I’m a coffee nut. Daily do I imbibe at the carafe of the dark mysterious brew. Today I bring you….

Another tidbit of well-traveled coffee humor….

You Know You’re Drinking Too Much Coffee When…

  • Juan Valdez named his donkey after you.
  • You ski uphill.
  • You speed walk in your sleep.
  • You answer the door before people knock.
  • You sleep with your eyes open.
  • You just completed another sweater and you don’t know how to knit.
  • You grind your coffee beans in your mouth.
  • You have to watch videos in fast-forward.
  • The only time you’re standing still is in an earthquake.
  • You lick your coffeepot clean.
  • Your eyes stay open when you sneeze.
  • The nurse needs a scientific calculator to take your pulse.
  • Your T-shirt says, “Decaf is the devil’s coffee.”
  • You can type sixty words a minute with your feet.
  • All your kids are named “Joe.”
  • You don’t need a hammer to pound nails.
  • Your only source of nutrition comes from “Sweet and Low.”
  • You don’t sweat, you percolate.
  • You’ve worn out the handles on your favorite mug.
  • You’ve built a miniature city out of plastic stirrers.
  • People get dizzy just watching you.
  • People can test their batteries in your ears.
  • When someone asks you,” How are you?”, you say,” Good to the last drop.”
  • Your birthday is a national holiday in Brazil.
  • You’d be willing to spend time in a Turkish prison.
  • You go to sleep just so you can wake up and smell the coffee.
  • You speak perfect Arabic without even taking a lesson.
  • Your Thermos is on wheels.
  • You can outlast the Energizer Bunny.
  • You don’t even wait for the water to boil anymore.
  • You think being called a drip is a compliment.
  • You don’t tan, you roast.
  • You don’t get mad, you get steamed.
  • You soak your dentures in coffee overnight.
  • Your coffee mug is insured by Lloyds of London.
  • You think CPR stands for “Coffee Provides Resuscitation.”

Now, if you will excuse me, I’m going to go have another cup of coffee. “ZZZAP!”

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About Isabella LeCour

She is nothing more than the collections of thoughts placed into the virtual worlds. She is a poet, a mother, a lover, many things to different people. But mostly, she is nothing but smoke and mirrors - some ethereal thing that blinks in an out of existence.
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